It’s not very often I brush off negative commentary directed towards my hair. Sadly, wearing my hair natural offends, upsets, confuses, bothers, frustrates, and annoys a number of individuals. If a black boy or a Jew with my standard fro wears his hair out, he’s cool. I do it, I’m angry, a lesbian, an angry closeted lesbian, lazy, and my personal favorite, a refugee look alike. Yes, indeed. Once upon a time, an individual said my hair made me look like an African refugee.
From that point on, I laugh off any commentary steering me away from the personal look I most admire.
A male coworker initiated a conversation asking how I maintain my hair. He really wanted to ask, “do you know what I do with my hair?” He brilliantly rephrased it and concluded his mane maintenance dialogue–probably what he considered a necessary for me informational session– with “you have to use a lot of olive oil.” I was enjoying my cookie too much to say, “Thank you, Mr. John Freida.”
What tickles me most is the interaction. After hearing stories of braids and mild relaxers, do the speakers expect me to go out on my next day off and tame my hair to their liking? What was the point of the unsolicited, huge emphasis on U-N-S-O-L-I-C-I-T-E-D, advice?
I have come VERY FAR in having solid confidence in my hair. If someone chooses to dye, relax, perm, have extensions sewn in, get braids, wear a wig etc. that’s her or his prerogative. A few days ago, I gave a fellow commuter a “your hair is on point” compliment whilst on the subway. She rocked her ponytail like nobody’s business!
Wearing my hair au natural– coiled kinks and all– is not a subliminal message or a loud personal statement. Simply after trying a number of techniques this hairstyle is most convenient for my lifestyle.
I LOVE MY HAIR!