We tell teenage girls all the time to not rush relationships, to wait, that boys are not the be all and end all. You would think that this lesson carried over into their twenties, but we’ve been noticing that some women didn’t get the message when they were girls–you don’t NEED a man for fulfillment. It’s disheartening to see smart, hilarious, gorgeous women forget about their hard work, forget about their education, forget about themselves, and try to snare a man by acting like a reality dating show contestant because they feel that they NEED a man in order to be complete. A reminder: those women are pretty much on a glorified game show, for one, and for another most of them don’t have anything outside of their looks. You LivLunatics do!
“Don’t need a man?! You feminist man haters! It’s human nature!” is usually the knee-jerk response upon hearing “you don’t need a man.” What we’re trying to say is that it’s one thing to want a man. But it’s another to feel that you need a man to make your life complete and then completely forget about yourself and the people who already love you for the fabulous lady that you are all for the sake of a date.
Again, if you want a relationship, go for it! But please don’t forget about yourself and the people who love you already for something that may or may not be a sure thing. We’re not discouraging casual flings by any means–we’re talking about going out with friends, having a cute guy smile at you, and then completely ditching your girlfriends and desperately trying to win him over for the sake of a kiss or a date or a phone number. It makes you look rude and diminishes your awesomeness–you don’t need some strange guy’s approval. Think about things more clearly. Do you need a man, or is there something else bothering you that you’re avoiding? Remember–you are more important than a date. Once you love yourself, you’ll be able to really know what you actually want and need as opposed to what you think you want and need. In the words of RuPaul, “if you don’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love someone else?”